The Kill Waker
The Wind Waker. It was the first Zelda game that I ever played, but I gave up on it when I got to the Forsaken Fortress and never played the game since. But about three years ago I thought I should give it a try. So I went to my local Gamestop but they didn't have it. I was sad because I went to every store that sells games and they all say they don't have it. Then about a week later me and my dad went to a local garage sale. While he was looking for junk I went to the kid's section. And then I saw it, a black box with a label saying, "The Wind Waker". I quickly grabbed it and went over to the person selling it and asked how much for the game. He said, "Please take it, please. I'll give it to you for free." That made me a bit skeptical, but I didn't really care so I took his offer. When we got home I turned on my wii and put in the disc. I got a nostalgic feeling when it booted up. When I got to the title screen I noticed a couple things that were off. First off there wasn't any music or sound, secondly the sky was black, and lastly the creepiest thing, and the title said, "The Kill Waker". It made me wonder, did the guy's kid hack it or something? But I wanted to play it so I pressed the start button. Everything was fine until I got to the part where Link's sister gets kidnapped. Link was to jump and Tetra would catch him. But she didn't. Link fell and right before he hit the rock the screen cut to black for thirty seconds. Then I was at the scene where you met the King of Red Lions. Except he was red and black and had an evil scary grin and said, "Hello Link. I'm sorry for what happened to you and your sister. I'm The King of Black Lions." Then I noticed Link. His clothes where black, his skin pale as the moon, and he seemed sad with blood and his face and arms. He continued, "You must make that bitch that killed you pay and that bird too. Take this instrument of death and make them suffer!" Then I got the "Kill Waker" There was no description—then he said he needs a sail. I went out and the saw it was night, but it was pitch black with no stars. I noticed the NPCs were looking at me strangely, like they were scared. I tried to talk to them but they would say nothing or scream. I went to the salesman with enough money but he wouldn't sell it to me. I couldn't use the Waker for whatever reason. I targeted the salesman then I could use it so I did. Then the screen went to black and I heard a scream. It said I got the sail but when I looked at the salesman his head was on the table. Dead. I scream about what happened then go back to playing. I was confused about what happened so I tried it on the children. It went to black and I heard screams, next they were laying on the ground with black eyes with tears of blood. As sick as it was I continued to play it. I went back to my boat and said to go to the location marked on the map. While I was sailing I noticed something creepy. Link seemed happy after what happened. When I got to the location I noticed it was Tetra's ship. When I got on board the crew began to try to kill me. But Link used the Waker to kill them all. What I saw next was horrid; everyone was killed in a sick way. One had a knife in the eye, another was on fire with his left arm missing, and the others were even worse. Then Tetra came to see what was going on. In a cutscene Link used the Waker and it went back to black. Then I saw Tetra ripped in half and Link kneeling over her. Then a message block said “I got Tetra's Heart”. When I got back to the boat the King of Black Lions said, "Nice job. Now we must go to the bird. So I went to the fortress. After getting the hammer I was sent to the bird boss battle. After getting the mask off the only thing I could do was use the Waker. After I did, I saw the body with no head, it was a gory mess there was blood everywhere and even on Link. Then his sister came and said, "I hate you I hate you! You killed all those people and the bird you..." Then to my surprise Link used the Waker again. Aryll screamed then fell. Link turned his head 180 degrees with an evil grin and said, "They are all dead. Game over." It went to black then a message box said, "You're next." To my horror Link began to walk to my screen slowly and laughing. I tried to turn off my Wii, but it wouldn't work. When he got to my screen he screamed then it went off. That experience scarred me deep. I went back to the guy's house but when I got there I saw an old house. A jogger ran up to me and said no one has lived there for years. I went back home got the game and it's case and buried it in my back yard. Hoping I never see it ever again. Category:Pasta Trying To Be Good When It Sucks Enough To Be A Troll Category:Cliche Madness Category:POINTLESS VIOLENCE TOTALLY MAKES IT SCARY U GUIZE